Hello readers!
Sorry for the delay in writing. The past couple of weeks have been CRAZY with school!! I had a mid-term paper for my Literary Theory class that was consuming much of my time - followed 7 days later by the requirement of the first 2 chapters of my educational research paper. YIKE! But they're done. Now - I have to turn in 1 chapter per week of my research paper... And I have to start working on my term paper for Lit Theory. It's a critical paper - whatever that means. But we got to choose a literary work over which to write our papers, and I naturally chose The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath. I'll be glad to be working with a book I know so well. At least I'll be able to speak intelligently about it. I hope.
In other news: I have resigned at Check 'n Go. My last day will be this coming Monday, the 31st. I'm glad that I'll have more time to dedicate to my school work - and also to the pursuit of a possible job for the spring that doesn't involve ripping off the poor. Actually - I had a very promising interview at Tulsa Community College to be an Adjunct Professor teaching Freshman Comp for the Spring term. The lady said as soon as a position opens up - it'll be mine. So - probably by January - I'll be an English teacher at the college level.
For those of you playing along at home - let's review.... April 2004 - Cendant lays me off for the 3rd and final time. I decide to move to Chicago and start all over again. June 2004 - Move to Chicago with only what I can fit in my car. Live with my Aunt Carla and Grammy. Share a bedroom the whole summer with cousin Brian. Work 40 hours a week at a small travel agency where I am treated like a moron. Discouraged with my life in Chicago - I begin to think about the bigger picture... What do I want to be when I grow up??? I came at long last to the decision I knew would one day come. I want to be a teacher. Of English. At the high school, and ultimately at the college level. I began to look into going to college in Chicago. One word EXPENSIVE. I started to look at colleges back here in Oklahoma. One word CHEAP. The decision was made much easier by the fact that Alex and I - although technically broken up - were still talking everyday, and both still wanted very much to be together. Decision made. I would move back to Oklahoma. September 2004. Move back to Oklahoma and into my Mother's house in Tulsa with only what I could fit in my car. Find a really dumb job at First Data Corporation working as a customer service representative in a call center. January 2005 begin the process of taking classes toward Alternative Teacher Certification. April 2005 - Alex moves to Tulsa from Norman, and we begin living together. August 2005 - Completed necessary testing for alternative certification, sent all papers into the state for review and licensure. Begin Grad School - Master of Science in College Teaching with an English Emphasis. Cut to now - a year and a half after I decided what I wanted to do - I'll be doing it. How's that for resolve.
I know for most of you - that little review of the past year and a half was old news. But to me, it's significant. It is proof positive that I can achieve the things I set out to achieve. And that I can be successful. Trivia fact: did you know I made the best grades of my entire collegiate career once I started working toward this goal??
It proves to me - once you know what your true profession is supposed to be - you will succeed in joining it.
I hope this has inspired some of you to go out there and go after what you really want. Sure - it has taken some time, and money, and risk... But I am already seeing pay-off. And everything so far has been well worth it.
Friday, October 28, 2005
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Chaos and Creation in the Backyard
Oh, Paul McCartney... You are so talented.
Can I just say I am LOVING Paul's new album!! Alex bought it for me Tuesday night, and I've been listening to it non-stop since.
It's good stuff, in the way you'd expect Sir Paul to be. That's just how he rolls. He's a pimp.
But I digress.
For those of you keeping track of my professional developments - it seems I have an interview lined up for next week... At Tulsa Community College! I'd be teaching Freshman Comp probably, but it's a start, and it's not Check 'n Go!! One of the people I have class with at NSU had heard me saying that I was interested in getting in at TCC - and as soon as he heard of an opening, he let me know who to contact. Lesson: it is good to let people hear what you want to achieve, because they just might help you achieve it.
Should I get a position at TCC - my goal becomes this: Get enough $$ stock-piled away to pay Nov. & Dec. bills - then QUIT MY DUMB JOB!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOO HOOOOOOO I don't think it'll take too long, as I only need about $150 to finish covering Nov... then it's on to Dec - and out.
It would be nice if I could quit now - cause school is starting to slide into that downward slope in which all the assignments start coming rapid-fire, and you just kind of hang on, and hope you come out at the other end without road rash. I have 2 group presentations to prepare for the week after next, a book review for Lit Theory due next Wed, and Chapters 1 & 2 of my research paper due week after next. AAAACCCCKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!
Plus - the kicker is - I have to take the MAT. I've been procrastinating about it - but I have to complete it within my first 16 hours of grad work... And as of Dec - I've taken care of 9.
As for the rest of this week - I've got school tonight, then tomorrow I have to make ready the garage sale and price things, etc... Saturday is the garage sale - Sunday I get to recouperate, and then Monday - back to work. Busy busy busy.
For any reader out there who is finishing his bachelor's and considering working for a litle while before he takes grad school - know that working and grad school don't go together very well unless you're taking 1 class a semester, or doing one of those earn your masters in 18 months attending class just one night a week things. But for those of us not getting our masters in business, but instead in something fluffy and arty - work + grad school = BIG HEADACHE.
Well - I've complained enough for today. Time to study some more. yippie
Can I just say I am LOVING Paul's new album!! Alex bought it for me Tuesday night, and I've been listening to it non-stop since.
It's good stuff, in the way you'd expect Sir Paul to be. That's just how he rolls. He's a pimp.
But I digress.
For those of you keeping track of my professional developments - it seems I have an interview lined up for next week... At Tulsa Community College! I'd be teaching Freshman Comp probably, but it's a start, and it's not Check 'n Go!! One of the people I have class with at NSU had heard me saying that I was interested in getting in at TCC - and as soon as he heard of an opening, he let me know who to contact. Lesson: it is good to let people hear what you want to achieve, because they just might help you achieve it.
Should I get a position at TCC - my goal becomes this: Get enough $$ stock-piled away to pay Nov. & Dec. bills - then QUIT MY DUMB JOB!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOO HOOOOOOO I don't think it'll take too long, as I only need about $150 to finish covering Nov... then it's on to Dec - and out.
It would be nice if I could quit now - cause school is starting to slide into that downward slope in which all the assignments start coming rapid-fire, and you just kind of hang on, and hope you come out at the other end without road rash. I have 2 group presentations to prepare for the week after next, a book review for Lit Theory due next Wed, and Chapters 1 & 2 of my research paper due week after next. AAAACCCCKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!
Plus - the kicker is - I have to take the MAT. I've been procrastinating about it - but I have to complete it within my first 16 hours of grad work... And as of Dec - I've taken care of 9.
As for the rest of this week - I've got school tonight, then tomorrow I have to make ready the garage sale and price things, etc... Saturday is the garage sale - Sunday I get to recouperate, and then Monday - back to work. Busy busy busy.
For any reader out there who is finishing his bachelor's and considering working for a litle while before he takes grad school - know that working and grad school don't go together very well unless you're taking 1 class a semester, or doing one of those earn your masters in 18 months attending class just one night a week things. But for those of us not getting our masters in business, but instead in something fluffy and arty - work + grad school = BIG HEADACHE.
Well - I've complained enough for today. Time to study some more. yippie
Sunday, October 09, 2005
Bottle of white... Bottle of red...
Hello again.
Well - my beloved Sooners lost to texas this week. It wasn't close. It wasn't pretty. But since the longhorns haven't won yet this century, I guess I won't begrudge them a victory.
I guess.
The weekend was nice. PERFECT weather. If the weather could be exactly as it was the past couple of days 100% of the time, I would be a happy girl.
Friday night we didn't do much as I had to get up early Saturday to go to work. But Saturday night, we had dinner with Alex's Mother, and then went to see The Greatest Game Ever Played. It was a good movie. It reminded me of Remember the Titans. Good times. Today, I had brunch with my Mom, Aunt Carla, cousin Brian, and his girlfriend Jennifer. We went to BBD's. I can recommend the Lorraine omelet to those of you in the area.
Then Alex and I ran some errands and are now back home. Dinner is cooking and Desperate Housewives will start in 30 mins. Then, it's back to the books. I've really got to get my Lit Theory mid-term paper done this week. And with the daunting task of the garage sale looming - that will not be an easy feat.
For those of you who emailed me regarding my last post - I'm really okay. I get prosaic sometimes in my writing, and I can see now where it might have looked like I was having a problem. I was sad that day. That day was not a good one. But I'm not suicidal or anything. :) I do appreciate the messages of support that I received, however. ;)
Well - my beloved Sooners lost to texas this week. It wasn't close. It wasn't pretty. But since the longhorns haven't won yet this century, I guess I won't begrudge them a victory.
I guess.
The weekend was nice. PERFECT weather. If the weather could be exactly as it was the past couple of days 100% of the time, I would be a happy girl.
Friday night we didn't do much as I had to get up early Saturday to go to work. But Saturday night, we had dinner with Alex's Mother, and then went to see The Greatest Game Ever Played. It was a good movie. It reminded me of Remember the Titans. Good times. Today, I had brunch with my Mom, Aunt Carla, cousin Brian, and his girlfriend Jennifer. We went to BBD's. I can recommend the Lorraine omelet to those of you in the area.
Then Alex and I ran some errands and are now back home. Dinner is cooking and Desperate Housewives will start in 30 mins. Then, it's back to the books. I've really got to get my Lit Theory mid-term paper done this week. And with the daunting task of the garage sale looming - that will not be an easy feat.
For those of you who emailed me regarding my last post - I'm really okay. I get prosaic sometimes in my writing, and I can see now where it might have looked like I was having a problem. I was sad that day. That day was not a good one. But I'm not suicidal or anything. :) I do appreciate the messages of support that I received, however. ;)
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
I miss OU in the fall
...and in the winter. It's such a beautiful campus, and I miss being there so much. Especially days like today when I'm feeling a little blue. Nothing fatal. Althogh sometimes a non-fatal blow rots and turns into a fatal wound. Time will tell.
I know it isn't interesting to many of you for me to wax nostalgic about my days in Norman. But I remember so fondly how the benches between the library and Adams looked covered in fallen leaves. And how welcoming the lawn in the north oval was all covered in snow. One year - it snowed so much that some clever students made a chess board and all its pieces out of snow. Dyeing one side red, and leaving the other white. There always seemed to be such hope resounding through the halls of the school. Even at mid-terms when all of the over-caffienated, and over-stressed students scurried about to cram in the studying they had left until the last possible moment.
There was hope.
People were in love everywhere you looked. Engagement rings were always the newest fashion, and always in style. By spring, wedding invitations papered the mailboxes, and girls ran about finding dresses and halls, while the men finished their classes, and began future careers. The feminist movement did happen. But one could never tell by looking at the campus in spring.
It was beautiful. This week - I am sure the campus is bursting with Crimson and Cream on every wall. Every student proudly wearing his colors - confident that Texas will fall once again to Stoops and his mighty Sooners. And I would be one of them. I would be just as confident, and just so clad. But I am here. And to look at me, one coudn't tell that I am a Sooner born and a Sooner bred. One could tell only that I am a student - with so many books that I can't even cary them all on my back. With so much studying left to do that I've always got this stressed out look deep within my eyes.
With a heart on the verge of breaking.
I miss the days when it was me and Phill and Allison, Lauren, Laura, Angie. But always me and Phill. I miss the days when I could just pick up the phone, and within 5 minutes - I wasn't alone, but surrounded by friends who wanted nothing more than to hear me laugh and see me smile. I miss the days when I wanted to pick up the phone.
I find myself in a strange new place where I don't want to call friends, and I don't want to go out. Maybe it's that I'm tired constantly - and I have nagging in the back of my mind the fact that there is something else I should be doing. Writing a paper, or reading for school. Maybe it's that I can't relate to the people I once called friends anymore. I'm different now - and no one has noticed it. Not even I had noticed it - until recently. And I don't reach out to new friends because I worry I'm not ready. Since I don't know who I am right now, how can I know whether I'll be able to be a good friend to a new person. Chances are - I can't.
I have so much guilt hanging over my head that Suzie has been living back in Tulsa since July, and here it is October, and I haven't made any effort to go see her. I don't call her - though I easily could. Suzie - who drove all night to come to my high school graduation. Suzie who has always been so sweet. Suzie. Whose wedding I didn't even go to. I should have moved mountains to be there. But I didn't. I feel so awful now that I couldn't call her. I wouldn't know what to say. No excuse is good enough, because there is no excuse.
Sarah calls. I don't answer. Not that I don't want to talk to her or that I don't love her. I just don't have anything to say. To anyone. Heather calls. Same story. I know if I'm not careful - soon no one will call. Still I don't pick up the phone. I leave it on silent so I won't hear it ring. If I don't hear it - I can't feel the swell of guilt. I can just swim safely in ignorance.
I'm not a good person.
And it's taken me a lot of time to come to that realization.
I guess what I'm trying to say is - I miss OU in the Fall.
I know it isn't interesting to many of you for me to wax nostalgic about my days in Norman. But I remember so fondly how the benches between the library and Adams looked covered in fallen leaves. And how welcoming the lawn in the north oval was all covered in snow. One year - it snowed so much that some clever students made a chess board and all its pieces out of snow. Dyeing one side red, and leaving the other white. There always seemed to be such hope resounding through the halls of the school. Even at mid-terms when all of the over-caffienated, and over-stressed students scurried about to cram in the studying they had left until the last possible moment.
There was hope.
People were in love everywhere you looked. Engagement rings were always the newest fashion, and always in style. By spring, wedding invitations papered the mailboxes, and girls ran about finding dresses and halls, while the men finished their classes, and began future careers. The feminist movement did happen. But one could never tell by looking at the campus in spring.
It was beautiful. This week - I am sure the campus is bursting with Crimson and Cream on every wall. Every student proudly wearing his colors - confident that Texas will fall once again to Stoops and his mighty Sooners. And I would be one of them. I would be just as confident, and just so clad. But I am here. And to look at me, one coudn't tell that I am a Sooner born and a Sooner bred. One could tell only that I am a student - with so many books that I can't even cary them all on my back. With so much studying left to do that I've always got this stressed out look deep within my eyes.
With a heart on the verge of breaking.
I miss the days when it was me and Phill and Allison, Lauren, Laura, Angie. But always me and Phill. I miss the days when I could just pick up the phone, and within 5 minutes - I wasn't alone, but surrounded by friends who wanted nothing more than to hear me laugh and see me smile. I miss the days when I wanted to pick up the phone.
I find myself in a strange new place where I don't want to call friends, and I don't want to go out. Maybe it's that I'm tired constantly - and I have nagging in the back of my mind the fact that there is something else I should be doing. Writing a paper, or reading for school. Maybe it's that I can't relate to the people I once called friends anymore. I'm different now - and no one has noticed it. Not even I had noticed it - until recently. And I don't reach out to new friends because I worry I'm not ready. Since I don't know who I am right now, how can I know whether I'll be able to be a good friend to a new person. Chances are - I can't.
I have so much guilt hanging over my head that Suzie has been living back in Tulsa since July, and here it is October, and I haven't made any effort to go see her. I don't call her - though I easily could. Suzie - who drove all night to come to my high school graduation. Suzie who has always been so sweet. Suzie. Whose wedding I didn't even go to. I should have moved mountains to be there. But I didn't. I feel so awful now that I couldn't call her. I wouldn't know what to say. No excuse is good enough, because there is no excuse.
Sarah calls. I don't answer. Not that I don't want to talk to her or that I don't love her. I just don't have anything to say. To anyone. Heather calls. Same story. I know if I'm not careful - soon no one will call. Still I don't pick up the phone. I leave it on silent so I won't hear it ring. If I don't hear it - I can't feel the swell of guilt. I can just swim safely in ignorance.
I'm not a good person.
And it's taken me a lot of time to come to that realization.
I guess what I'm trying to say is - I miss OU in the Fall.
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
It's October - why is it still 90 degrees outside?!?!?
So - I've been sick this past week. I'm thinking that working with money all day exposes me to lots of germs and that's why I've been sick TWICE since August. But I digress... Being all doped up on NyQuil and prescription cough medicine has had its perks. I literally slept all day Saturday, and most of the day Sunday. Thankfully, I'm feeling much better now, and am able to update my blog again for you fine people. :)
Sad news out of Norman this past Saturday. I can't even imagine what the vibe must be on campus after something like that. I noticed it didn't make the USA today - so for those of you living out of the region... I'll just say that a boy attached a bomb to himself and sat on a bench on campus and blew himself up. It is haunting to know the spot where he did this. It is haunting to think why he did it - or what sort of pain he must have been in to do something of the like. It keeps reminding me of when Phill and I saw the guy get hit by the train. Remember that, Phill? It creeped me out for weeks afterward. I'm sure this event will do the same.
On a much lighter and happier note, my Sooners pulled off a victory last week against Kansas State. I am really hoping they will beat texas once again and make Mac Brown cry. We shall see.
I'm getting into mid-term time at school. I have a huge paper due the 19th of October. Today - I hope to finish reading the book about which I have to write the paper. Grad school really is just like college, except the assignments are MUCH more vague, long, and difficult.
'Tis all for now, my lovlies....
Sad news out of Norman this past Saturday. I can't even imagine what the vibe must be on campus after something like that. I noticed it didn't make the USA today - so for those of you living out of the region... I'll just say that a boy attached a bomb to himself and sat on a bench on campus and blew himself up. It is haunting to know the spot where he did this. It is haunting to think why he did it - or what sort of pain he must have been in to do something of the like. It keeps reminding me of when Phill and I saw the guy get hit by the train. Remember that, Phill? It creeped me out for weeks afterward. I'm sure this event will do the same.
On a much lighter and happier note, my Sooners pulled off a victory last week against Kansas State. I am really hoping they will beat texas once again and make Mac Brown cry. We shall see.
I'm getting into mid-term time at school. I have a huge paper due the 19th of October. Today - I hope to finish reading the book about which I have to write the paper. Grad school really is just like college, except the assignments are MUCH more vague, long, and difficult.
'Tis all for now, my lovlies....
Sunday, September 25, 2005
So I'm not technologically inclined - at least I've got my looks
I wanted to do what all the cool kids are doing and post a picture of what I'm currently watching... But I'm so not that good with HTML. So - everybody put on your imagination cap!!! It's time to imagine!!!!!!!
Currently watching: Desperate Housewives Season 1
It's actually really good. Yet once again, I'm the last to catch on to a fad... But Alex and I have decided that if we can start watching season 2 now - we won't be so far behind. :) For those who never got into it last year - I highly reccommend you go to best buy and pick up season 1 on dvd. It's worth the $$ and the show is NOTHING like I originally thought it would be. It actually has substance, and a pretty cool plot. And Terri Hatcher isn't making me want to throw large objects at the TV like she usually does.
Tonight - we're going out to dinner & a surprise for my sister Shannon's birthday. I can't post what is after dinner yet just incase Shannon reads this before we go. I'll let you all know how it was later. :) But it's gonna be fun!
Time to clean the house!
Currently watching: Desperate Housewives Season 1
It's actually really good. Yet once again, I'm the last to catch on to a fad... But Alex and I have decided that if we can start watching season 2 now - we won't be so far behind. :) For those who never got into it last year - I highly reccommend you go to best buy and pick up season 1 on dvd. It's worth the $$ and the show is NOTHING like I originally thought it would be. It actually has substance, and a pretty cool plot. And Terri Hatcher isn't making me want to throw large objects at the TV like she usually does.
Tonight - we're going out to dinner & a surprise for my sister Shannon's birthday. I can't post what is after dinner yet just incase Shannon reads this before we go. I'll let you all know how it was later. :) But it's gonna be fun!
Time to clean the house!
Thursday, September 22, 2005
Post Toasty
What was this news, you ask? Well, this past May, I met a teacher from a local high school, and told her that I was looking for a job teaching English. Like, at a community college or something of the like. She referred me to a lady who is the director of the English as a Second Language (ESL) program at Tulsa Technology Center (TTC) note: what I thought she said was that this lady was the director of the ESL program at TCC (Tulsa Community College) this will come into play later on in the story So - I immediately sent my resume to this lady, and never heard another word. Until a week ago...
The lady called me and asked if I were still interested in teaching for her. I said yes, and we set up an interview for 2 days later. I was so excited because A - I'd be teaching, and B - I'd be able to quit my job at Check 'n Go. I went to the interview where I realized that I was interviewing at TTC - a vocational school, and not TCC - a junior college. I thought "no big deal. We all have to start somewhere". Then, after about 20 minutes, she showed me the schedule, and pointed out the classes she would need me to teach. My schedule right now: Wednesdays: Class from 430p-10p Thursdays: Class from 730p-10p The classes she wanted me to teach were Monday/Wednesdays from 6-9pm, and Tuesday/Thursdays from 6-9pm. Problem. It was well past my add/drop period. AND - although she said it was merely a formality - I would have to be approved by the TTC board in order to be hired. And the board wasn't meeting until September 26th. So I would have had to gamble with dropping a class, and changing my established schedule for a maybe. I couldn't do it.
Plus - were I to actually get a job teaching in a high school this January, I wouldn't be able to teach for her and take masters classes at the same time.
In the end I sent her an email thanking her for her time and for the opportunity, but explained my situation.
I'm okay with it - but I'm sad because I'm now not teaching, and still stuck at C'nG. Hopefully I'll have all of my teacher certification stuff done by the end of October, and be able to find a teaching job for January. Keep your fingers crossed for me.
In other news - Alex is home!!! HOORAY!!! He came home Tuesday night, and I was SO happy to see him. We've fallen back into our old routine, and it's almost like he was never gone. Some call it "boring" - I call it "reassuring".
Those of you in the area - garage sale chez Marmee Oct 15. Come buy some of my crap. :)
Out.
The lady called me and asked if I were still interested in teaching for her. I said yes, and we set up an interview for 2 days later. I was so excited because A - I'd be teaching, and B - I'd be able to quit my job at Check 'n Go. I went to the interview where I realized that I was interviewing at TTC - a vocational school, and not TCC - a junior college. I thought "no big deal. We all have to start somewhere". Then, after about 20 minutes, she showed me the schedule, and pointed out the classes she would need me to teach. My schedule right now: Wednesdays: Class from 430p-10p Thursdays: Class from 730p-10p The classes she wanted me to teach were Monday/Wednesdays from 6-9pm, and Tuesday/Thursdays from 6-9pm. Problem. It was well past my add/drop period. AND - although she said it was merely a formality - I would have to be approved by the TTC board in order to be hired. And the board wasn't meeting until September 26th. So I would have had to gamble with dropping a class, and changing my established schedule for a maybe. I couldn't do it.
Plus - were I to actually get a job teaching in a high school this January, I wouldn't be able to teach for her and take masters classes at the same time.
In the end I sent her an email thanking her for her time and for the opportunity, but explained my situation.
I'm okay with it - but I'm sad because I'm now not teaching, and still stuck at C'nG. Hopefully I'll have all of my teacher certification stuff done by the end of October, and be able to find a teaching job for January. Keep your fingers crossed for me.
In other news - Alex is home!!! HOORAY!!! He came home Tuesday night, and I was SO happy to see him. We've fallen back into our old routine, and it's almost like he was never gone. Some call it "boring" - I call it "reassuring".
Those of you in the area - garage sale chez Marmee Oct 15. Come buy some of my crap. :)
Out.
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Okay, okay...
Some of you are getting restless wanting to know the possibly great news. I don't have time to post a full entry right now, but I'll say that the "possibly great thing" wasn't so great - and isn't going to happen. No - it has NOTHING to do with Alex and I. It's about teaching. :) Don't worry - I'm totally okay with it. Details later.
Thanks for reading. :)
Thanks for reading. :)
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Possibly GREAT news on the horizon
I don't want to jinx it - so I'm not going to say what it is yet... But by the end of the day today I might just have some exciting news to share!! Stay tuned!!!
how's that for a teaser???
how's that for a teaser???
Sunday, September 11, 2005
Comics & Slippers
Good Sunday, readers.
Thanks to an email I received from Tiffany - I know that at least one person is reading in silence. But I think that there are more of you out there. So I'll keep posting. :)
Yesterday was busy but nice. I went to my Aunt's brother-in-law's wedding in Bethany. It was in one of the biggest churches I've ever seen!! I was worried at first that they had invited 1,000 people judging by the size of it. But they hadn't. It was tasteful and elegant. And - as is the case with all weddings I attend, I found several little things that I want to rip off and add to my own wedding. :) One note about the bride - she was so beautiful! And not just because it was her wedding day, because 99.9% of women are breathtaking on their wedding day... They had a video presentation which showed pictures of the bride and groom growing up - in every picture, she was so beautiful. It was so refreshing to me, because I am going to guess she's a size 18/20 but she was not self-conscious... She was confident and new that she was a beautiful girl. Mega props to you, bride from the wedding yesterday. You rock!!
After the wedding I grabbed a quick but nice dinner with Angie, Chad and Scott, and then I headed home. It was sucky to have to drive 4 hours in a day, but worth it to see my friends and Donna, Tito, Emmanuel and Nick. (Who is LOVING his school!!) :)
I've been thinking over the past couple of days about trying to find a teaching job for the Spring semester. I won't be able to take as many hours in grad school, and that's a downside... But I would be gaining experience in front of a classroom, and I think that would help me out a lot. Working at Check 'n Go is not motivating, and it drains my very soul every time I go. But if I were teaching... Doing what I love... I'm thinking that I would be a much happier me. :)
So - I'll only take maybe 3 hours in the spring... But I can still take 9 over the course of the summer... That would put me at 21 hours. I could take 6 in the fall... 27 Then I'd only need... roughly 5 more hours to be finished. I could probably finish spring '07. And then I'd not only have earned a Master's degree - but I'd have a year and a half experience in front of a classroom. I'm thinking that is the thing I need to do. But I've been all mind change-y recently... So this is all subject to complete overhaul.
Today is errand day. I need to get an oil change. (Because my car is high maintenance, and literally beeps at me until I give it gas, or an oil change) Then I have to go to campus to the library for 20 or so mins. Then, I have to clean the house. Nothing fancy... Just things that need to be done.
I wish you a relaxing Sunday!
Thanks to an email I received from Tiffany - I know that at least one person is reading in silence. But I think that there are more of you out there. So I'll keep posting. :)
Yesterday was busy but nice. I went to my Aunt's brother-in-law's wedding in Bethany. It was in one of the biggest churches I've ever seen!! I was worried at first that they had invited 1,000 people judging by the size of it. But they hadn't. It was tasteful and elegant. And - as is the case with all weddings I attend, I found several little things that I want to rip off and add to my own wedding. :) One note about the bride - she was so beautiful! And not just because it was her wedding day, because 99.9% of women are breathtaking on their wedding day... They had a video presentation which showed pictures of the bride and groom growing up - in every picture, she was so beautiful. It was so refreshing to me, because I am going to guess she's a size 18/20 but she was not self-conscious... She was confident and new that she was a beautiful girl. Mega props to you, bride from the wedding yesterday. You rock!!
After the wedding I grabbed a quick but nice dinner with Angie, Chad and Scott, and then I headed home. It was sucky to have to drive 4 hours in a day, but worth it to see my friends and Donna, Tito, Emmanuel and Nick. (Who is LOVING his school!!) :)
I've been thinking over the past couple of days about trying to find a teaching job for the Spring semester. I won't be able to take as many hours in grad school, and that's a downside... But I would be gaining experience in front of a classroom, and I think that would help me out a lot. Working at Check 'n Go is not motivating, and it drains my very soul every time I go. But if I were teaching... Doing what I love... I'm thinking that I would be a much happier me. :)
So - I'll only take maybe 3 hours in the spring... But I can still take 9 over the course of the summer... That would put me at 21 hours. I could take 6 in the fall... 27 Then I'd only need... roughly 5 more hours to be finished. I could probably finish spring '07. And then I'd not only have earned a Master's degree - but I'd have a year and a half experience in front of a classroom. I'm thinking that is the thing I need to do. But I've been all mind change-y recently... So this is all subject to complete overhaul.
Today is errand day. I need to get an oil change. (Because my car is high maintenance, and literally beeps at me until I give it gas, or an oil change) Then I have to go to campus to the library for 20 or so mins. Then, I have to clean the house. Nothing fancy... Just things that need to be done.
I wish you a relaxing Sunday!
Friday, September 09, 2005
What?? Did I depress you?
I'm judging by the collective silence out there that either A - you've all stopped reading, because my life is only interesting to me... or B - I depressed the hell out of each and every one of you with my mopey babble the other day. I - for the purposes of my self esteem - am going to assume it is the later of the two.
I'm feeling better today. I came to the realization that I'm merely PMS-ing... I'll be fine in 5-7 days. (We hope) Side note - I find it interesting, and ladies - help me out if you feel me on this one - that every month I have my womanly cycle - and every month, I wonder why I'm cranky and bloated, and crying. I wonder this from its onset, until about 12 hours later when I FINALLY realize that it's just good old PMS... How is it that something I've gone through every month for the last 15 years still catches me off guard???
Your next question might be, "Amber - why are you updating your blog in lieu of doing your homework?" My answer is simple - I tried to do my homework tonight, but the reading that I have to do, which is on reserve in the library, was checked out. Therefore - I'll have to get it tomorrow or Saturday. Which really isn't great for me, because thus far I've been able to get homework done before the weekend even hit. Or at least the bulk of it.
So - I'm here. Hanging out. Missing Alex. But in one piece. :)
Up for the weekend... I'm making a trip to Bethany, OK to attend a wedding. My Aunt's brother in law is getting married. I'm not terribly close with the bride or groom... But, my Aunt's in laws have always been very hospitable to me, and as I was invited - I decided I should go. (Also - I'll get to see my Aunt & Uncle, cousin Emmanuel, and cousin Nick. And I'm really looking forward to hearing how Nick is doing in his first semester at NCSA)
That's all for now. I'm going to get ready for bed, and try to call Canada.
If you're out there reading - let me know. :) I haven't heard from any one in a long time.
I'm feeling better today. I came to the realization that I'm merely PMS-ing... I'll be fine in 5-7 days. (We hope) Side note - I find it interesting, and ladies - help me out if you feel me on this one - that every month I have my womanly cycle - and every month, I wonder why I'm cranky and bloated, and crying. I wonder this from its onset, until about 12 hours later when I FINALLY realize that it's just good old PMS... How is it that something I've gone through every month for the last 15 years still catches me off guard???
Your next question might be, "Amber - why are you updating your blog in lieu of doing your homework?" My answer is simple - I tried to do my homework tonight, but the reading that I have to do, which is on reserve in the library, was checked out. Therefore - I'll have to get it tomorrow or Saturday. Which really isn't great for me, because thus far I've been able to get homework done before the weekend even hit. Or at least the bulk of it.
So - I'm here. Hanging out. Missing Alex. But in one piece. :)
Up for the weekend... I'm making a trip to Bethany, OK to attend a wedding. My Aunt's brother in law is getting married. I'm not terribly close with the bride or groom... But, my Aunt's in laws have always been very hospitable to me, and as I was invited - I decided I should go. (Also - I'll get to see my Aunt & Uncle, cousin Emmanuel, and cousin Nick. And I'm really looking forward to hearing how Nick is doing in his first semester at NCSA)
That's all for now. I'm going to get ready for bed, and try to call Canada.
If you're out there reading - let me know. :) I haven't heard from any one in a long time.
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Oh, Canada
Alex and his brother left this morning for Canada. It is amazing how quickly a home can become just an empty house.
Remember when I moved away to Chicago? That's the last time he and I have been apart this long.
UGH! I never thought I'd be one of those women who hated when her guy would leave town. I always thought they were just wimpy and rediculous. "He'll be back in 4 days" "it's only for a month", these were things I'd say to them. Before I had the good fortune to fall in love.
Now I know that being apart is so much more difficult than it sounds. For those couples who are separated due to the war - or their jobs - I don't know how they can handle it. Hats off to you.
As for me, I have a lot to do today, so I'm going to get to it. Alex says he'll be back before I know it. I have a feeling this time will crawl by, seconds ticking like hours. But we shall see.
Remember when I moved away to Chicago? That's the last time he and I have been apart this long.
UGH! I never thought I'd be one of those women who hated when her guy would leave town. I always thought they were just wimpy and rediculous. "He'll be back in 4 days" "it's only for a month", these were things I'd say to them. Before I had the good fortune to fall in love.
Now I know that being apart is so much more difficult than it sounds. For those couples who are separated due to the war - or their jobs - I don't know how they can handle it. Hats off to you.
As for me, I have a lot to do today, so I'm going to get to it. Alex says he'll be back before I know it. I have a feeling this time will crawl by, seconds ticking like hours. But we shall see.
Saturday, September 03, 2005
Saturday - working
And hello again, dear readers!!
Here I sit - rotting at work as I write today. I am missing the season opener of my beloved Sooners as I type. :(
I need to remember to bring a TV up here for my Saturday sentences.
This week has been busy but okay. Lots of reading, not a lot of sleeping, and I've developed a pretty mean tendonitis (sp?) in my right thumb. Every night, I take mass amounts of ibuprophen before Alex wraps my thumb in one of my super chic scarves which has become my adjustable nighttime ice pack.
School was okay this week. A lot less terrifying. My Lit Theory class is still the hardest class I've taken so far in my college career... But I turned in my first assignment this week, and we'll see how close to target I am - or if I need to just give up. :) Kidding! I'm going to tough it out with this class. Even if I can't earn an A - I'm going to stick with it. I'm thinking that for the rest of my classes I shouldn't have much of a problem earning an A. It's mostly attendance, and as I am learning - the key to success in Grad school is keeping up with the weekly assignments. Really - if I stick to those like I should, and don't fall behind, none of this should prove insurmountable.
Alex's brother Sterling stayed with us a couple of days this week. He was working on getting his things packed up from their Mother's house. He and I had a very nice and semi-intellecutal conversation about the benefits of comic books. We also discussed Shakespeare. Sterling is someone I'm really still just getting to know on a personal basis (beyond just the fact that he's Alex's brother) and I have to say that he's a really cool guy. Intelligent and funny. He also enjoys long walks on the beach... Just kidding. I don't know if he does... But I was starting to sound like a personal's advertisement. In short - I like Sterling, and I'm glad I'm getting to know him.
I hope that Laura won't mind - but I wanted to let those of you concerned know that her Uncle and Grandmother who lived in New Orleans got out and are safe and well. They do not know the state of their home, and won't for who knows how long... But the important thing is that they got out, and are okay. For any of you who have loved ones in the New Orleans area, my thoughts are with you. I really wish that there were something tangeable I could do for the people who have lost everything. I wish I had a large home and could offer spare bedrooms. I wish I had a semi truck and could drive there with it - full of water, food, and supplies. I wish I could do more than donate what little spare money I have to the American Red Cross. It's an overwhelming sense of helplessness. I even felt guilty as I got out of my hot shower this morning, had a warm breakfast, and drove to work in my air-conditioned car.
But I can't dwell on it. I have to just be thankfull for the things I have that are wonderful in my life. My home, my friends... I could list a million things. Although I complain frequently... I really am fortunate in my life.
I don't have any plans for this weekend. Other than possibly helping Alex's Mother pack her things and prepare to move. What is really nice is - after today, I don't have to be at work again until Thursday!! (We get Monday off as a paid holiday) I am looking forward to being able to do homework at home in my jammies. :)
Alex leaves for Canada on Wednesday. He and Sterling are driving there and will be gone for 2 weeks. They are going - as some of you already know - to see Pearl Jam. EIGHT TIMES!! It does sound a little rediculous, but I am so excited for them. I know that they will have an excellent time! I'm going to miss him though. Who knows how I'll fare without him here?!!?
That's all for now, readers... I've got some work to do here, and then, I should start on some homework. WOOOOHOOOO!!!!!
Here I sit - rotting at work as I write today. I am missing the season opener of my beloved Sooners as I type. :(
I need to remember to bring a TV up here for my Saturday sentences.
This week has been busy but okay. Lots of reading, not a lot of sleeping, and I've developed a pretty mean tendonitis (sp?) in my right thumb. Every night, I take mass amounts of ibuprophen before Alex wraps my thumb in one of my super chic scarves which has become my adjustable nighttime ice pack.
School was okay this week. A lot less terrifying. My Lit Theory class is still the hardest class I've taken so far in my college career... But I turned in my first assignment this week, and we'll see how close to target I am - or if I need to just give up. :) Kidding! I'm going to tough it out with this class. Even if I can't earn an A - I'm going to stick with it. I'm thinking that for the rest of my classes I shouldn't have much of a problem earning an A. It's mostly attendance, and as I am learning - the key to success in Grad school is keeping up with the weekly assignments. Really - if I stick to those like I should, and don't fall behind, none of this should prove insurmountable.
Alex's brother Sterling stayed with us a couple of days this week. He was working on getting his things packed up from their Mother's house. He and I had a very nice and semi-intellecutal conversation about the benefits of comic books. We also discussed Shakespeare. Sterling is someone I'm really still just getting to know on a personal basis (beyond just the fact that he's Alex's brother) and I have to say that he's a really cool guy. Intelligent and funny. He also enjoys long walks on the beach... Just kidding. I don't know if he does... But I was starting to sound like a personal's advertisement. In short - I like Sterling, and I'm glad I'm getting to know him.
I hope that Laura won't mind - but I wanted to let those of you concerned know that her Uncle and Grandmother who lived in New Orleans got out and are safe and well. They do not know the state of their home, and won't for who knows how long... But the important thing is that they got out, and are okay. For any of you who have loved ones in the New Orleans area, my thoughts are with you. I really wish that there were something tangeable I could do for the people who have lost everything. I wish I had a large home and could offer spare bedrooms. I wish I had a semi truck and could drive there with it - full of water, food, and supplies. I wish I could do more than donate what little spare money I have to the American Red Cross. It's an overwhelming sense of helplessness. I even felt guilty as I got out of my hot shower this morning, had a warm breakfast, and drove to work in my air-conditioned car.
But I can't dwell on it. I have to just be thankfull for the things I have that are wonderful in my life. My home, my friends... I could list a million things. Although I complain frequently... I really am fortunate in my life.
I don't have any plans for this weekend. Other than possibly helping Alex's Mother pack her things and prepare to move. What is really nice is - after today, I don't have to be at work again until Thursday!! (We get Monday off as a paid holiday) I am looking forward to being able to do homework at home in my jammies. :)
Alex leaves for Canada on Wednesday. He and Sterling are driving there and will be gone for 2 weeks. They are going - as some of you already know - to see Pearl Jam. EIGHT TIMES!! It does sound a little rediculous, but I am so excited for them. I know that they will have an excellent time! I'm going to miss him though. Who knows how I'll fare without him here?!!?
That's all for now, readers... I've got some work to do here, and then, I should start on some homework. WOOOOHOOOO!!!!!
Sunday, August 28, 2005
One week down - 15 to go.
So, I made it through week one of work + school with few scars. I have completed all of my homework for the week, and still managed to get in about 30 hours at the job. I'm only keeping that pace at work until after Labor Day. (so I can get the holiday pay.) Is it really worth it? Probably not - but I can't say no. One day, I'll need a favor - and one of the favors I've done will be ready to cash in. I hope.
I worked today, so it just now feels like the weekend is beginning. Unfortunately, for me, tomorrow will be clean the house day. This place is beyond messy. Marmee told me to get used to it - because the further into the semester I get - the less time I'll have to worry about housework, or cooking, or bathing... Maybe she didn't mention bathing. Hard to be sure. But, my thinking is - clean while I have time to clean. Then there won't be layers of filth. Or - at least not as many layers.
After work today, Alex and I went to his Mother's house to pick up some boxes of his things. She has been trying for 6 or 7 months to sell her house, and he's been procrastinating on getting his things out. I don't know what I'll do when my Mom finally decides she's selling our house. I have SO MUCH CRAP piled up in that house, it's UNREAL. After going to his Mom's - we went to Marmee's and had dinner. It was a good time. Marmee is such a riot. She gets to laughing, and her face turns purple, and it's just contagious. :)
I meant to post on here that before school started, I read the cutest book. For anyone who is a teacher (or becoming one), I recommend Thirty-two Third Graders and One Class Bunny by Phillip Done. Despite the fact that I am wanting to teach college-level students, and NOT 3rd grade, I found the book to be inspiring, funny, and relevant. I know most of you are in school - either teaching, learning, or both... But maybe over Christmas break - look into it. You'll love it. :)
Okay - I'm babbling at this point. So I'll end for the day.
I worked today, so it just now feels like the weekend is beginning. Unfortunately, for me, tomorrow will be clean the house day. This place is beyond messy. Marmee told me to get used to it - because the further into the semester I get - the less time I'll have to worry about housework, or cooking, or bathing... Maybe she didn't mention bathing. Hard to be sure. But, my thinking is - clean while I have time to clean. Then there won't be layers of filth. Or - at least not as many layers.
After work today, Alex and I went to his Mother's house to pick up some boxes of his things. She has been trying for 6 or 7 months to sell her house, and he's been procrastinating on getting his things out. I don't know what I'll do when my Mom finally decides she's selling our house. I have SO MUCH CRAP piled up in that house, it's UNREAL. After going to his Mom's - we went to Marmee's and had dinner. It was a good time. Marmee is such a riot. She gets to laughing, and her face turns purple, and it's just contagious. :)
I meant to post on here that before school started, I read the cutest book. For anyone who is a teacher (or becoming one), I recommend Thirty-two Third Graders and One Class Bunny by Phillip Done. Despite the fact that I am wanting to teach college-level students, and NOT 3rd grade, I found the book to be inspiring, funny, and relevant. I know most of you are in school - either teaching, learning, or both... But maybe over Christmas break - look into it. You'll love it. :)
Okay - I'm babbling at this point. So I'll end for the day.
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Grad School - Day One
Okay - so day one, class one... I'm thinking I've got this in the bag. The prof let us know that we have an 87% chance of an A in the class - the rest with B's and very few if any grades lower than that. He quelled all my fears. Then I went to Lit Theory. And all my fears were confirmed!! This class is going to be CRAZY hard!! The teacher's style is like watching a Tarentino film! Completely non-linear and tangential. I'm SO freaking out!!! This class is going to be my undoing. I'm seriously considering dropping down to 9 hours. I think 12 hours might be too many. When I'm facing a 5 chapter research paper, 2 12 page papers, and who knows what else... Maybe that's enough.
I can't believe that I was sitting here in this living room already doing homework last night. I realize that for a lot of people - grad school is just like undergrad, except more expensive. I think that for me - it might be a helluva lot more of a challenge. We shall see.
What was nice was that I heard from some of the girls I made friends with last semester at NSU today. I miss seeing them everyday, since they were the closest thing I had to friends here in Tulsa. And it was perfect, because we were in-class friends. That way, we could hang out, and be friends, but still have our personal lives. It really appealed to my flaky side.
Can I just say that I am so thankful for Alex?? He is such a wonderful guy. He takes EXCELLENT care of me. What would I do without him???
I can't believe that I was sitting here in this living room already doing homework last night. I realize that for a lot of people - grad school is just like undergrad, except more expensive. I think that for me - it might be a helluva lot more of a challenge. We shall see.
What was nice was that I heard from some of the girls I made friends with last semester at NSU today. I miss seeing them everyday, since they were the closest thing I had to friends here in Tulsa. And it was perfect, because we were in-class friends. That way, we could hang out, and be friends, but still have our personal lives. It really appealed to my flaky side.
Can I just say that I am so thankful for Alex?? He is such a wonderful guy. He takes EXCELLENT care of me. What would I do without him???
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Pre-First-Day-of-School Jitters
Can I just tell you all, I'm a little TERRIFIED of starting grad school!?!?! I always have some trepidation before a new semester - but this one has created bowl-shaking nerves... That might have been an overstatement, but you get the general idea.
I'm scared.
Not of the professors or the students. Just of the workload. And of the fact that I have to maintain above a 3.0 to stay in the program. YIKE! For the bulk of the summer I've had myself believing that the GPA requirement was just a good indicator that the classes would be easy and it would be no problem. But I think I knew the whole time that wasn't likely. And now I'm sure of it.
What I'm taking:
Educational Research
College Teaching
2nd Language Acquisition (online class)
Literary Theory
I am the most afraid of the Lit Theory class. Mostly because I'm worried I don't really know anything about it, and I'll be laughed out of the classroom for aspiring to be an English Prof with such little knowledge base.
What I'm finding to be surprisingly true, however, is that most - if not all - people have fears like these. Being found out as a fraud. Being busted for being underqualified, or worse yet - being discovered to be the moron you truly are. I am trying to seek comfort and solace in this idea. It's sorta working.
I also - at some point this semester - have to take the MAT (Miller Analogies Test) and pass it to remain in the grad program. Have any of you taken it? Do you have any pointers? Since it costs $115 a pop - I'm hoping to only have to take it once. We'll see how that works out.
I'm off to have nightmares about showing up naked to the wrong class now.
Sweet dreams to you, readers...
I'm scared.
Not of the professors or the students. Just of the workload. And of the fact that I have to maintain above a 3.0 to stay in the program. YIKE! For the bulk of the summer I've had myself believing that the GPA requirement was just a good indicator that the classes would be easy and it would be no problem. But I think I knew the whole time that wasn't likely. And now I'm sure of it.
What I'm taking:
Educational Research
College Teaching
2nd Language Acquisition (online class)
Literary Theory
I am the most afraid of the Lit Theory class. Mostly because I'm worried I don't really know anything about it, and I'll be laughed out of the classroom for aspiring to be an English Prof with such little knowledge base.
What I'm finding to be surprisingly true, however, is that most - if not all - people have fears like these. Being found out as a fraud. Being busted for being underqualified, or worse yet - being discovered to be the moron you truly are. I am trying to seek comfort and solace in this idea. It's sorta working.
I also - at some point this semester - have to take the MAT (Miller Analogies Test) and pass it to remain in the grad program. Have any of you taken it? Do you have any pointers? Since it costs $115 a pop - I'm hoping to only have to take it once. We'll see how that works out.
I'm off to have nightmares about showing up naked to the wrong class now.
Sweet dreams to you, readers...
Sunday, August 21, 2005
A few more pictures...
Here are just a few more pics from NY... I am working on scrapbooking for this trip, too - so those of you who live close by can see more tangeable evidence of out vacation.
I've got more pics that I'll post this week! So many to wade through!
PS - Do any of you watch Big Brother?? Cause, man - that was CRAZY this week.
I've got more pics that I'll post this week! So many to wade through!
PS - Do any of you watch Big Brother?? Cause, man - that was CRAZY this week.
Central Park
AWWWW!!! Aren't we the CUTEST!?!?!?!?! We walked through Central Park, and this is when we decided to sit down for a rest. We watched people ride through the park on rickshaws, and lots of rollerbladers and joggers. It really was cool that in the middle of a huge city, you can forget about the skyscrapers and subways, and just enjoy being outside.
Brooklyn Bridge
From the harbor cruise we got a beautiful view of the Brooklyn Bridge. What you can't tell from the picture is that it was 4000 degrees out that day! We were SO hot!!
The View from our room
Despite the sorta scary mold marks on the window - we really did have a nice room. The window was a little... uh - dirty. But I think that was mostly because it housed a window unit air conditioner.
This view was really amazing at night. Even the traffic was pretty.
This view was really amazing at night. Even the traffic was pretty.
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