hey blue, here is a shell for you

don't know why i'm feeling off today. yesterday too. i'm just not comfortable in my skin, in my head, my house, etc...

alex is picking up on it - and because he's so sweet, he's feeling guilty - and hoping that he isn't the cause. he's not. i don't honestly know what is the cause. probably - it's just stress. but i am rather stressed also about my weight loss. i've stalled out yet again, and i'm getting really frustrated again. it seems like i only loose the week after a fill, and then i'm stuck in neutral for the other three weeks.

it sucks.

i've been trying all day to clean up this house. i'm so tired of having to step around piles of crap all the time. boxes from our move, suitcases from trips, dirty laundry, books, aaaaaackkkkkkk! but each time i get one or two things accomplished - i loose steam, and i stop working. i haven't touched my laundry yet - and my bathroom is a disaster. but i really wanted to get the living room/dining room/kitchen area cleaned, since those are the common rooms. we'll see if tomorrow morning brings new motivation to work.

also - i'm tired of all the reading i've been doing for my young adult literature class. it was fun at first - but now, i'm really not in the mood to read a bunch more books. there were seventeen required titles, ten outside reading choices, 2 text books, and 1 literature circle choice. although i'm enjoying the class, i really think that 30 required books for any one class is beyond excessive.

i'm ready for this semester to be over. i'm ready for the wedding. i'm ready for the honeymoon. honestly, i'm ready to be done with my phd, and to move back to tulsa.

i'm just bleah...